When we talk about risks involved in kink, it can be hard to know exactly what those risks are, especially when you’re new.
I’m going to do my best to break down some of the myths, risks, and potential ways to mitigate those risks, because we love RACK around here.
When we talk about RACK, we are talking about:
Risk
Aware
Consensual
Kink
Being risk aware doesn’t mean making kink completely safe. Most things we do carry some level of risk.
It means understanding what could reasonably go wrong, how serious those consequences could be, what you can do to reduce the likelihood of them happening, and then deciding whether those remaining risks are ones you are comfortable consenting to.
It also means recognising that different people have different limits. A risk that one person is completely comfortable accepting might be an absolute hard limit for somebody else.
So when it comes to Locktober, what are some of the risks?
Poorly fitted chastity devices
A chastity cage should not be cutting off circulation, causing significant swelling, creating persistent numbness, breaking the skin, or producing severe pain.
Small irritated areas can become chafing, blisters, cuts, pressure sores or broken skin if the cause isn’t addressed.
And once the skin barrier is damaged, infection becomes another potential risk.
Something can also fit reasonably well for an hour and still become a problem when it is worn for much longer periods of time. Extended wear means friction, pressure, erections, movement, heat, sweat and normal changes in the body are happening again and again.
You can mitigate this risk by measuring yourself properly and finding a device that fits you well and is comfortable. Resin cages are a good starting point.
Check your skin regularly and use as much lubricant and lotion as you need to maintain skin integrity.
Hygiene and moisture
Genitals are warm, sweaty places at the best of times.
Put them inside or around a device for extended periods and you now have sweat, urine, dead skin, lubricant and genital secretions potentially collecting in difficult to clean areas.
Clean your cage regularly! Make sure everything is properly dry afterwards!
Hygiene is risk management.
Losing access to the key
You should always have some way of getting the cage off if you need to.
Keep a spare key somewhere accessible. In your wallet, phone case, bag, or somewhere else you can actually get to it quickly and easily.
If somebody else is holding your key, you still need an emergency option. You’re the one wearing the cage, it’s your responsibility to make sure you can get it off when you need to.
Most chastity devices sell spare keys. It’s highly recommended to have one.
Losing the ability to cum at all.
The idea is super hot, especially for someone into long term chastity.
Unfortunately, the reality is that a month without orgasms is not going to completely destroy your ability to climax ever again. SorryNotSorry.
You might feel different after a month of denial. Your arousal might feel different. Orgasming might take longer, happen faster, feel overwhelming, or just feel a bit weird after you’ve spent an entire month being told you’re not allowed to do it.
But you have not permanently broken your orgasm button.
If you get to the end of Locktober and realise that you don’t actually want to cum anymore… then that’s probably something you should discuss with your keyholder.
You fall in love with your keyholder
Denial can be a really special and intimate activity.
You’re handing somebody control over your pleasure. You’re thinking about them when you get horny. You’re waiting for their permission. Their attention, teasing, praise and control can start becoming very closely tied to your arousal.
Sometimes those feelings turn into affection or devotion.
Sometimes people get very, very attached to their keyholder.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with that, but it’s worth being aware of, especially if the relationship was never meant to be romantic.
Have open conversations with your keyholder about what the relationship actually is.
Locktober is my favourite time of the year. I love how intimate it can be, how much fun denial can become, and how a whole month of it can deepen a dynamic in ways you probably weren’t expecting.
But part of doing kink well is thinking about more than just the fun parts.
If you’re considering Locktober, take a little time beforehand to think about what could realistically go wrong for you. Think about your body, your cage, your relationship with your keyholder, your limits, and the things that would make you stop.
Write them down if you need to.
Decide which risks you’re comfortable accepting, which ones you want to reduce, and which ones are simply not worth it for you.
And remember that being risk aware doesn’t mean being scared of kink.
It means knowing what you’re getting yourself into before you willingly hand over the key.
Happy Locktober!
